dreams dreamed, dreams wished, dreams lost..

I have heard from so many people around me about blogs and blogging, but always felt it was a tedious job to write down ones thoughts! I have never been a good writer, until something or someone has inspired me beyond my tolerance limit. Like the time after I watched Munna Bhai -part 2 and I got inspired by the re-visitation of Mahatama Gandhi's version of life! Or the time when I decided I needed to pen my thoughts and started writing about how life is beautiful and love is wonderful :)

Well basically, my today's blog is a result of my own prolonged silence! The silence of my thoughts and desires, buried deep under the burden of my duties and responsibilities. I realized while I have been busy shaping my career and putting a million bucks in my savings before my 30th birthday, I had lost focused from what really matters in life! The smile that reaches my eyes, the peace of heart, the circle of friends with there cheerful chatter and celebration of festivals with the family! Trying to see the big picture all the while, I had forgotten how to enjoy the small things in life. So after a long lonely journey on the path of frustration, irk and irritation I finally realized that I am missing myself from my life! Sounds weird, but its true. In the whole process of being someone important, and doing something great, I had lost my true self somewhere and so now I am trying to find myself again! I need a long awaited come back :)

Some people have a hard time to believe that you can actually lose yourself anywhere! But I think there would be many people like me who in the process of growing up, or just being "MATURE" in the eyes of world, would have changed so much that their true identity, desires and nature would have been lost somewhere. Like for me I miss being able to write poems, or laugh till my stomach hurts, or make the people around me laugh, or fill up the room with cheer and light, or being able to make new friends, talk to people and let anyone come close to me! I have changed so much in last few months, that I now scare myself! But well realization of the change, and change for the better are just a part of the complete change! I now at least know, what kind of life I don't want to live, and what kind of person I don't want to be! So all I need now is to figure out what kind of person I want to be.

Some people spend their entire life figuring out what they want to do in life. I am few of those lucky ones, who knew right from 7th grade what I wanted from my life. I always wanted to be an engineer, and be able to design new things. Bring technology in the daily life. I also know that one fine day I want to be a business tycoon, and I also know what kind of business I want to do. I even have been able to figure out just what kind of skills I would find useful for my career. I had planned my life all the way till I was 50! But than like every plan, even this plan was side-tracked by few hiccups : large and small. I guess eventually what matters is the fact that my side-tracked train of life is now back on track with the vigour and passion to fulfill my long dreamed dreams.

I have met people, who feel my life is perfect. Who think that I am crazy to be complaining about anything at this point. With the best kind of job at hand, and travelling places, and making a small fortune at the same time why should I be missing anything at all! But I guess no matter how high we fly, or how far we go, we always want to come back home. Home ,that is deep-rooted on ground :)

Lastly I would just like to end my blog by advising everyone to take out few moments everyday and think about what did we do truly meaningful in the whole day. The tears we cry and smiles we fake - is it truly worth it? Life is indeed very beautiful, and time is moving very fast! The sooner we line up our priorities in life, and sooner we realize what we truly desire, the more we would be able to enjoy our self.
Ruminating back on the life we have lived when we are old, I hope each of us would be able to find that moments which truly brought joy to our hearts, and made us better human beings!

P.S I am new to this blogging world. Would love some feedback from my blogger friends to make sure I don't bore the words out of everyone else :)